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T O P I C    R E V I E W
touchadmin Posted - 09/17/2003 : 03:30:26
Mentoring is one of the most valued things believers can do in the context of cell life, but few churches have caught on and are doing it well.

I believe this is due to the fact that most church leaders have never not mentored. Everyone wants a mentor, but no one wants to do it without being mentored first so they know what to do. It's put American Christians into quite a loop of indecision about this important part of discipleship.

Larry Kreider has written an excellent book on mentoring and it's importance in the body of Christ. The book is called "The Cry for Spiritual Fathers and Mothers". If you have not read this book, I urge you to get a copy and put it on the top of your reading list. TOUCH sells this book, as well as www.dcfi.org, Larry's organization.

I can say with great certainty that I would not be in full time ministry and walking with Christ the way I am today if it were not for the hard work and dedication of one man in particular, one who mentored me into cell leadership over a two year process. Greg became my friend, big brother and intercessor for those years, and helped me discover and embrace God's call on my life.

Are you being this to someone in your church or cell group? Don't wait until it's been done for you... if you yearn for a mentor and one does not approach you, use the hunger pangs to pour into someone else and bring them along where you are today. You do not have to be years ahead of them or "fully mature", whatever that means! You only need to be a few weeks ahead in the game of life and willing to love them.

Remember, the hard part of mentoring is on the part of the mentor, not the protege, or the one being mentored. That's why inviting someone to be your protege for a season works far better and more often than when a protege asks a potential mentor to help him or her.

If you have questions about this vital part of kingdom building, reply to this message and let's begin to dialog, allowing the world to see what we ask and say so we can all learn together.

If God has used you to mentor others, do share your testimony... others will be spurred on toward Godliness with your words!

- Randall Neighbour
12   L A T E S T    R E P L I E S    (Newest First)
Ian Rowland Posted - 03/02/2005 : 04:47:39
Hi,

We are about to take the first steps towards having mentoring as a key area within our training and I was wondering if you have any advice about how to go about setting it up, rolling it out and embedding it within the values and mindset of the people.

At the moment they are used to the concepts of cells, encounter weekends, prayer partners (even if they are still in the process of truly living it).

Thanks

Ian Rowland
RedSalt Posted - 10/01/2004 : 14:53:05
will do... thanks for the idea!
touchadmin Posted - 10/01/2004 : 08:53:44
Redsalt, I think you should start a new thread in the "What's on your mind" area of the pastor's side. This would be a very interesting discussion indeed!

Randall Neighbour
Forum Administrator
RedSalt Posted - 09/21/2004 : 14:34:35
Is there a chance we can begin to discuss it here... I really would like to work through some of the issues of our "binding and loosing" some engage in.

What are some of the scriptual backing in developing this thelogocial belief?
touchadmin Posted - 09/20/2004 : 21:06:13
Both Neil Anderson and Peter Wagner have written good books on the theological basis for and the urgent need for deliverance, or helping people get set free from satanic strongholds.

I suggest you visit amazon.com and type in their names and peruse the resources that pop up. Both are respected on the subject by most conservative evangelicals.

Oh yes, try a amazon.com search on Doris Wagner... Peter's wife. She too has written on this subject if I'm not mistaken.

Hope this helps!

Randall Neighbour
Forum Administrator
RedSalt Posted - 09/13/2004 : 23:45:50
Randall, you bring up a very big aspect that I have read about in many cell churches.... the loosing of strong-holds that satan has over us. Could you point me to some exhaustive materials that will help me to biblically understand this? Aswell what and how does this then practically fit into a cell church?

thanks!!!
touchadmin Posted - 09/13/2004 : 21:41:00
I have not used the IVP stuff you've mentioned, but I like IVP stuff in general, so I'm sure it's good.

One thing to remember when you're looking at the myriad of discipleship stuff out there... does the material encourage the user to examine their value system? Does it challenge them to release strongholds satan has had in their life? Does it challenge them to grow to the point "of moving out of the house" and starting a spiritual family (cell group) of their own?

There's tons of great discipleship stuff out there, but much of it has traditional church in mind, not cell-based church life. Just keep this in mind as you develop a mentor-driven discipleship system for those in your cell groups!

Randall Neighbour
Forum Administrator
RedSalt Posted - 09/07/2004 : 02:40:12
Have any of you ever used Discipleship Essentials before from IVP? It looks pretty good!
touchadmin Posted - 08/03/2004 : 11:11:26
My answer is greatly contingent upon what you are trying to develop within the protege.

A. If it's basic discipleship, I highly recommend Beginning the Journey and The Arrival Kit, both by Ralph Neighbour, Jr. I'd also recommend "Search for Significance" by Robert McGee. You'll get a lot out of McGee's book as well. It's powerful.

B. If it's a growing Christian who really has a good handle on the basics of the faith and is actually living out their Christian values, not just keeping themselves in deception with a set of lofty ideals, I'd take them through Paul Ford's book, Getting Your Gifts in Gear, a book on how to use your spiritual gifts with power. I'd also begin to work with them on some sort of a relational evangelism book like Touching Hearts by Ralph Neighbour, Jr. or Relating Jesus by Jim Egli. There are other great lifestyle evangelism books out there that you can use as well.

C. On many occasions, my proteges have needed additional help with more practical matters such as marriage enrichment, finances and eliminating debt, how to act in a group of people or at the dinner table, etc. And sometimes, I have to work with them in the areas of personal hygiene, nutrition, housekeeping, doing laundry, etc.

I don't think mentoring someone should be segmented or limited to just their spiritual side as it's a deepening friendship that gives the mentor permission to speak into and help the protege with all sorts of challenges they face in life.

Hope this helps!

Randall Neighbour
Forum Administrator
andybabyak Posted - 07/26/2004 : 15:49:24
Randall,

What three discipleship books would you recommend going through in a six month mentoring relationship?

Thanks.

Andy
touchadmin Posted - 03/22/2004 : 09:45:58
More thoughts on mentoring...

A mentoring relationship works best when the following parameters are set in place:

Both parties understand the nature of the relationship.
- "As your mentor, I'm going to be very focused on helping you become a mature Christian (or whatever you're mentoring them to do)."

Both parties understand the focus and the duration of the time together.
- "Over the course of the next six months, we'll work through these three discipleship books and apart from our time together as friends and in cell group, we'll meet at X time at Y place for 1 hour to discuss where you are in the books and answer any questions you may have."

I don't suggest that mentoring partnerships go on for more than six months on any one subject or issue. This doesn't mean that the mentoring part of the relationship can't be renewed after six months... I'm just suggesting that the mentor and protege close one door and open another after six months to gauge if the relationship has been healthy and profitable in moving the protege toward maturity in the area of focus.

Randall Neighbour
Forum Administrator
smalltownohio Posted - 10/09/2003 : 22:49:19
We've just emerged from our "Mentor/Apprentice" relationship (we were the apprentices). I'd just like to offer a bit of advice, if I may, to other Mentors.

In our mentor/mentoring relationship, we were paired with an older couple that we got along with quite well (he is an elder in the church).
Things were going well, as far as us being able to observe and learn things from them. However, there was a real problem regarding communication between us.

We were told, originally, that we'd be in this mentorship for about 6 months. As our small group drew closer to one another, our mentors made the decision that they didn't want to split the group (because "they" couldn't bear to part with members (their words, not mine). So without discussing it with us, our 6 months turned into a year, and then they decided that 2 years would be better (this is how it was done at their old church). When we tried to discuss it with them, they grew vague and distant. When we took our frustrations to our pastor, he said, "Well, I'd rather have you work this out on your own, if possible."

We've learned one thing from this. When we mentor someone, we'll make sure we all have a clear idea of what the game plan is, and we'll meet with each other periodically to discuss any concerns, issues, or just get a general feel for how things are going.

We've also learned that keeping a core group together for two years (or even a year) and then trying to make them split was a mistake.
The problem with being with one group for so long is that intimacies are formed, and, as was proof with our group, members feel unable to "break away". While it may feel nice and cozy to have this group you've been with for so long, it's not healthy to effective cell groups.

Thanks for your time,
Lisa


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